Kids’ Sport Poems
Here are some sporting poems that I wrote in an attempt to amuse kids who prefer balls to books.
Netball Nelly
When Netball Nelly caught the ball, she couldn’t stop
She just kept going, no matter what
Her teammates said, when you get the ball, stand still
But her two legs just couldn’t stand the thrill
And in the final, when it was all to be won
Netball Nelly couldn’t stop her run
Her teammates yelled, ‘Turn and prop!’
But her feet just would not stop
The ref gave a free to the other team
And the winning goal was scored with a mighty scream
Those other girls won with a win that was stunning
And Nelly was so embarrassed she didn’t stop running
Out of the court and down the street
Went Nelly and her travelling feet
She didn’t stop until she was home in bed
Her feet had stopped, but her face was still red
Playing Tennis with a Grunt
Oooh!
I serve the ball with power and precision
Aah!
And return it with a split-second decision
Eek!
I had to stretch hard on my backhand side
Oof!
And return another with a forehand dive
Huh!
If I practise some more, I could be a winner!
Aww!
But Mum just called me in for dinner.
I DO NOT BELIEVE IT!
Ping Pong Pete and His Smelly Feet
Ping Pong Pete loved playing table tennis
Especially with his best friend, Dennis
But he actually was a really bad sport
For when his ball was heading out of court
He’d throw his smelly socks at Dennis with a shout
Which would make sensitive Dennis pass out
And when he came to, Dennis would ask the score
Pete would say, ‘I won fifteen four!’
Matt Quartermaine is a Melbourne-based writer and comedian. With Matt Parkinson, Tim Smith and Andrew Goodone, he produces ‘The Chat’, a weekly podcast in which ‘four grown men in comfortable chairs spill their guts’. Click here to download it for free at iTunes.
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